Week 4 - The Impossible Life: Weekly Reflections on Faith, Pain, and Triumph

Elizabeth Ford
May 18
3 min read

Updated: Jun 1

Week 4: A Mattress on the Floor and a Baby in My Arms — The Unexpected Beginning

By Elizabeth M. Ford

🏚️ Coming Home to Poverty

After living day-to-day in a Red Roof Inn, holding on by a thread and living in fear each night, I made a decision: I was going home to Reston.

I returned to Reston, the place where I knew what poverty looked like. It didn’t scare me anymore because it had raised me. I thought maybe, just maybe, it would be easier to manage than this foreign world of instability I’d found in Manassas.

I brought my boyfriend with me. I found a temporary place. Then another. This has to be it, I told myself. This is my chance to finally work my way into stability.

I was 21. Determined. Desperate. Hopeful.

🤰🏾 Then… I Got Pregnant

Life had other plans.

Pregnancy arrived before peace. And I was not ready.

I was working in customer service, trying to “make it,” but my body was changing, my mind was spinning, and depression hit me like a brick. I left the job and went back to what I knew—waiting tables. At least there, I could earn quick cash and try to breathe.

But deep down, I knew the relationship I was in wouldn’t last.

And now I had a baby on the way.

Alone. Scared. Tired.

🚫 Failed Friendships and Evictions

I had a plan to move in with a friend. We were going to be roommates. But depression makes you unreliable. It steals your follow-through. And I let her down. That friendship fell apart, and with it, another door closed.

After my son was born, history repeated:

I was evicted—again.

That moment broke me. I had a baby in my arms and nowhere to go. No plan. No backup. Just fear.

🤝 Swallowing My Pride

Sometimes, healing starts with the most humbling step.

I called my father.

The same man I had spent years resenting. The man I swore I’d never ask for help.

And when I reached out, he did the unthinkable:

He welcomed me with open arms, like I had never left.

That kind of love shocked me. I didn’t think I deserved it.

But I was grateful. And in that moment, I saw what unconditional love looked like in a father.

He came to help me move as the landlord sent people to throw me out.

And then my sister took me and my baby onto her sofa.

But that didn’t last either.

She made me feel like a burden. I was already ashamed, and now I felt humiliated each day.

🛏 A Bag of Clothes and a Mattress on the Floor

That’s when a coworker from the restaurant offered me a small room to rent.

It wasn’t much—just space to lay a mattress and store a bag of clothes.

But it was mine.

It was the first place that felt like my own for me and my son.

And believe it or not, this humble room would open the door to a decade-long chapter I never could have seen coming.

In that same apartment, my now ex-husband was also renting a room.

We met there. And little did I know, I was about to enter a new level of abuse, manipulation, and trauma that would take everything in me to survive.

But this time… I wouldn’t go down easily.

💬 This Week’s Truth: Beginnings Don’t Always Look Like Dreams

We think the next chapter of our lives will start with fireworks or bright signs.

But sometimes, it starts with a mattress on the floor.

With a baby in your arms.

With a bag of clothes and nothing else.

Don’t dismiss the small beginnings.

Because God can do great things with broken places.

🔥 Overcomer Challenge:

This week, ask yourself:

Where do I feel like I’ve gone backward when I was supposed to be moving forward?
What small win in my life right now might actually be the beginning of something bigger? You only need to pick one. Don't overwhelm yourself. One is still a win.

Write down one moment from your life that seemed like failure but became a stepping stone. If you’re still in it—trust that the chapter isn’t finished yet.